Coryl Reef

writer, artist, and freelance editor // blogging about words, life, and all the rest


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Posts filed in: University

Through my years of higher (also: more expensive) education, I have learned some stuff. Only some. Anything related to university life, struggles, or tips will show here.

Advice To My University Freshman Self + Spreadsheet Template

With back-to-school season upon us, I’m sending some advice to my freshman self from my post-grad self. // Word Count: 600 Continue Reading Advice To My University Freshman Self + Spreadsheet Template

Last Day of University Classes Ever

I feel like I’m being born again. Or, rather, I’m approaching a rebirth. I’ll come out screaming, crying, and helpless, but with more knowledge and contextual fear than any infant that ever existed.

I’m more excited than scared, but I’m still scared. I have been in educational institutions since I was four years old. I went straight from high school to university, moving out in the process, living in a city I’d been to once, five hours away from everyone I knew. 

I’m mostly scared because of the financial problems I know I’ll end p facing. I’m in so much debt, and it’s hard to think all that money is worth anything when your degree doesn’t exactly have a “field” and any related careers can’t pay off that money in a reasonable amount of time.

I never had a job when I was in high school. It wasn’t a viable option. My parents’ work schedules were hectic, along with the personality of one of them; so even if I did manage to overcome my depression and anxiety, land a job, and mingle it with trying to stay in school, getting to and from shifts would be unstable. I didn’t work through univesity for the same reason: it wouldn’t have been accessible.

I always feel like a cop-out when I say that my mental health issues have hindered me from getting jobs. I have friends who are depressed, who have bipolar disorder, who have anxiety issues, and yet they hold jobs. They’veee had jobs. They work multiple jobs. They’re doing something that I can’t, and I feel like I should be able to. Like my mental illness can’t be a good reason for not working a shit job at Tim Horton’s or McDonald’s or in retail–all in the service sector, because that’s the only place you can really work if you don’t have a degree and a few years of experience.

But I need to remind myself that I’m my own person, and they’re all their own people. We’re different. The feedback has been unanimous, too, when I talk to them about this: I would be terrible at working in the service sector. I would hate a job like a cashier or fast food cook. I would end up being fired, really, because it wouldn’t be a good fit for me and the company would be able to hire someone else who could do a better job.

That’s a hard concept for me to reconcile. The fact that everyone I know has understood what I’m someone trying to reject: that I’m not suited for a certain type of work–the work that seems to me to be the “gateway” into the workforce. It isn’t like I’m not good enough and that I’m somehow less of a human, or less capable. These types of jobs wouldn’t work for me. 

I’m writing this post in my last class. It’s “Introduction to Rhetoric.” It’s okay. I don’t have anything to complain about. Frankly, I don’t have a lot to complain about when it comes to my university career. The one thing I can complain about, though, is the most frustrating: the creative writing courses. I applied to this university, this program, specifically because of those classes. And they were a huge disappointment. I feel like I’ve wasted my time. It’s hard to see the non-monetary value of my experience when it costed so much money.

I’m being birthed into the world again, ignorant of so much, but it isn’t as huge of a celebration or explosion as it might otherwise be. It’s quite bitter and extremely relieving, and I am very unenthused about being done. Well, I’m excited to be done because I’m looking forward to not being in school. But I’m not super thrilled about the “accomplishment” I’ve achieved. I think someone else could have done this experience better than me. 

I guess I’m feeling worthless agin. Standard day in my life, even the last day of my university classes.

How To Be An Untidy Student

AKA, how to be tidy and organised. It isn’t easy, but who the hell said anything was? Being tidy is especially helpful with my life as a university student sharing a house with other independents. // Word Count: 979 Continue Reading How To Be An Untidy Student

The Fate of “Writing Magic” As A Lit Major

I have lost the Magic that comes with writing, and I blame my studies as a Literature Major… as well as myself. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ // Word Count: 595 Continue Reading The Fate of “Writing Magic” As A Lit Major

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